What If
by Baron Hotschaft Von Hugenstein
Summary: Have you ever wondered what if? What if Edward had killed Bella that first day? What if Bella had picked Jacob? What if Bella and Edward had aborted Renesmee? What if... **ON HIATUS**
1. Midnight Sun: Red Eyes

_**Midnight Sun**_**: Red Eyes**

**What if...Edward had killed Bella that very first day in Biology? **

**Here's what Stephenie wrote in **_**Midnight Sun**_**, yet to be published: "I knew what would happen now. The girl would have to come sit beside me, and I would have to kill her."**

I decided to do it, to take this life. I was essentially selfish, and though it would cost our life here in Forks, I knew the instant gratification of Isabella Swan's blood would more than make up for it. It smelled increasingly delectable as Mr. Banner droned on about microorganisms. I tried to resist killing her at that moment. _Wait_, I cautioned myself. _You will get your chance soon enough_.

_What's with Cullen?_ Mike Newton was wondering. _He looks like he's in pain. Whatever. He's a weird guy. Why do so many girls like him? Oh, dammit, what did Mr. Banner just ask?_ His thoughts became boring again once I was out of the picture, but after answering Mr. Banner's question, he looked Bella over appreciatively. _His lab partner is something to look at, though. She's that new girl. Isabella. I like that name. _For some unexplainable reason, I tensed at Newton's casual analysis of Bella.

Finally, the bell rang. Only one more class, one more class. I escaped milliseconds after the nasal buzz of the bell alerted the next hour was to begin, and went to Spanish, where, somehow, Emmett was already there. _'Sup, Edward? _he asked casually.

Though Emmett was merely being friendly, I glared at him. _Sheesh,_ he thought. _Just common courtesy.  
Don't get your panties in a bunch._

I ignored Emmett and stared straight ahead. I could think clearer now that Bella's delicious scent, a combination of freesia, orange blossoms, and lavender, was no longer right under my nose. As Spanish began, I debated internally with the decision I had made. Was it rash? On one hand was the desire to drink that blood. I _needed_ Bella's blood. On the other was my family. The faces of Carlisle, Esme, Emmett, Rosalie, Alice, and Jasper darted through my head. I pushed them away impatiently. Señora Goff's Spanish, however, was much more interactive than the lectured Biology, and I couldn't remain on her thoughts for long.

After class, I found Bella's previous class—Gym—and waited for he outside the doors. She looked startled at the sight of me. "Hello," I said, turning on the charm. "My name is Edward Cullen. And you are Bella Swan."

Bella looked dazed. "Why didn't you call me Isabella?" she blurted.

I smiled knowingly. "I have my ways," I informed her cryptically. "May I take you for a stroll?" Bella nodded dumbly, and I knew I was going in all the right directions. I took Bella's arm, and led her gently from the crowded Forks High hallways to a more remote woodsy area directly behind the school. It was far enough away that no one would hear her scream.

"We will stop here," I decided in a small clearing. It was dark and green from the small amount of sunlight and the excessive tree coverage. "Let me be the last to welcome you to Forks."

"The—last?" Bella's brow furrowed in confusion, and a crease appeared between her chocolate brown eyes.

I smiled, a combination of allure and menace in my expression. "Thank you for visiting Forks," I continued, getting closer. Bella froze, a deer in headlights, and I circled her. She followed me with her eyes, seeming rooted in place. "I apologize for this, but you smell so good." Bella's face was full of terror, but I was so incapacitated by my thirst that I couldn't regret it.

I pounced on her, easily slicing my teeth into her jugular vein. I silenced her scream with a hand to muffle her mouth. She went limp in my arms as the forbidden flavor coursed through me, tasting better than I could have ever dreamed of. I was supremely disappointed when she ran dry. But I knew that memory, the memory of tasting that blood, would stay with me for eternity. I put Bella's body on the ground. Someone would eventually find it, I hoped.

But as I looked down at Bella, pale, white, and cold, regret seized me. It was nearly harder than the first wave of her floral scent in my nose. I was, oddly, sorry for killing this human girl. And I strongly wished I hadn't.

For the next few weeks, as we packed up and moved away, my red eyes reminded me constantly what I had done.

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**do u like it? it's going to be the only Midnight Sun one, because i don't want to ruin anything for anyone. the next few are Twilight, then i'll move on to the other 4 books. review!! lovelovelove, m**


	2. Twilight: Impact

_**Twilight**_**: Impact**

**What if...the van had crushed Bella?**

**Here's what Stephenie wrote in **_**Twilight**_**, p 56: "But of more immediate importance was the dark blue van that was skidding, tires locked and squealing against the brakes, spinning wildly across the ice of the parking lot. It was going to hit the back corner of my truck, and I was standing between them. I didn't even have time to close my eyes."**

All I could do was brace myself for impact. And when impact occurred, it was a crushing blow to my chest. I gasped, but my lungs wouldn't work. Something in me snapped, and pain licked from my feet up like a raging wildfire, consuming everything in its path. I staggered forward, but I was caught standing between my truck and the van, and I fell into the blue metal. I heard a low crack at my head's connection with the back of the van, and then it felt like my head was exploding into brilliantly colored fireworks. Bright red and black spots danced through my vision, and I felt myself slipping away. I didn't want to close my eyes, because I knew my chances were good that I would never open them if I closed them now. But my lids were so heavy, and unconsciousness was so peaceful.

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**yes, i know. these are all pretty depressing. but relah-ah-ax. they're getting less depressing. the next one is actually pretty funny. but bear with me, please? anyhooda, check out my new story "Becoming Jane" (and don't be a ghost-reader...review it! i keep getting hits but no one reviews!) and if you've ever read _Wicked Lovely _and _Ink Exchange_ by Melissa Marr i extended my horizons and added a Wicked Lovely fanfic. i also have a running fanfic contest called "Silence" that i only have one (ONE) entry for. how can i pick a winner when i only have one? so go enter that, and review everything! lovelovelove, m**


	3. Twilight: Unexpected Savior

_**Twilight**_**: Unexpected Savior**

**What if...Bella wasn't rescued by Edward in Port Angeles, and she had to deal with the stalkers alone?**

**Here's what Stephenie wrote in **_**Twilight**_**, p 161: "I braced myself, feet apart, trying to remember through my panic what little self-defense I knew. ... I wasn't going out without taking someone with me. I tried to swallow so I could build up a decent scream."**

Before my volume choked out, I used my air supply for a scream. It rang loudly in the alley, but there weren't any pedestrians close enough to hear. The first man shoved a grimy hand over my mouth. "Shut up, girl," he hissed.

In response, I bit his hand and kneed him in the groin. He groaned, releasing his hand from my mouth to bend down to clutch at his injury. "Who's next?" I asked. I tried to sound confident, but it came off sounding like I'd just sucked helium.

Another man, this one bulkier than the one I'd just momentarily defeated, stepped forward. I attempted again to scream, trying to catch the attention of anyone. But my throat was too dry. "You picked the wrong path, honey," the man said menacingly. I remembered that I could try to break his nose with the heel of my hand, and I stepped forward, ramming my hand into his face. His nose started gushing bright red blood.

My stomach flipped. This was not good.

"Dammit, girl, you broke my nose!" complained the bleeding man. I couldn't focus on him, though; I couldn't focus on anything but breathing in and out deeply. I knew if I passed out here, I would be finished. So I had to breathe. But then the man who I'd kicked stepped in, obviously recovered from my weak blow, and punched me swiftly in the stomach.

I doubled over with a muffled, "Oomph." This was not helping my not-passing-out strategy. I couldn't breathe at all yet, let alone breathe calmly.

Then, with no warning to me or to the stalkers, I abruptly vomited. The men were disgusted at my display. "Dude, the bitch puked!" one of the men said, wrinkling his nose. "That is seriously messed up, man."

I felt better, though. The blood that was still gushing out of the man's nose didn't bother me so much now. "Let's bail, man," suggested the last man with a shrug. The bleeding man nodded in agreement.

"C'mon, dudes, let's roll," the man I'd kicked instructed. With one last disgusted look at me, the other three men followed him, until they were out of my sight. When I could no longer see them, I exhaled and stared at the puddle I'd left on the sidewalk. Who knew that could save me? Feeling much better than I had since separating from Jess and Angela, I walked briskly back to town.

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**ha! that is SOOOOO Bella, don't you think? thanks to chocoholic4eva and BgirlAngelSpike for givin' me crap. i love you guys! and i hope i broke out of the depressing, it's just the only alternatives at the beginning of the books. sorry for all that. they're getting puh-retty funny! okay...so...go vote in my sexiest Twilight actor poll, enter my Silence fanfiction contest, and read my other stories! RECOMMENDATION: "Want" by willowgrace511. it rox! so, k, that seems to be it! revieewww! lovelovelove, m**


	4. Twilight: Interference

_**Twilight**_**: Interference**

**What if...Rosalie and Emmett had been there when Bella met the Cullens?**

**Here's what Stephenie wrote in **_**Twilight**_**, p 324: "I ... realized Rosalie and Emmett were nowhere to be seen."**

But my speculating about where they could be was cut off with a crash from upstairs. I looked to the staircase, to Esme's disapproving face, then to Edward's godlike eyes in confusion. "Um, should we be concerned?" I asked tentatively.

Jasper laughed lightly. I wondered if he felt my puzzlement at the situation.

"No need to worry, Bella," Edward assured me. "It's just Emmett. He and Rosalie will be here in a moment." He looked expectantly at the stairs, and I looked there, too.

Then, Emmett and Rosalie appeared. Emmett was in front of Rosalie, in almost a protective stance. But then he saw Edward and I, and smiled hugely. "Edward brought her back alive!" he crowed. He began to tear down the stairs toward us, but stopped when he realized Rosalie wasn't following him. She was glaring at me with a look of pure hatred. "Rose..." Emmett's voice was private, and it made me feel intrusive.

Rosalie's eyes turned hard, like solid topaz, and she didn't move. "Do you want to say hello to the homewrecker, Emmett?" she asked in a tone that made me flinch. "Go on, say hello. Don't worry about me."

"Rosalie," warned Carlisle. She ignored him.

Emmett gave her an exasperated look before ignoring the stairs altogether and leaping over the banister. "Emmett," Esme scolded good-naturedly. "Don't ruin my banister."

"Sorry," Emmett said, not sounding abashed at all, before skidding to a halt in front of me. "Hi, Bella!" he exclaimed, pumping the hand that wasn't securely held in Edward's in his hard, stony grip.

"Ow," I hinted. Emmett looked down at my hand in his, and realized belatedly that I was, indeed, a human. Edward stared at him meaningfully, and he released it. I flexed my fingers, and nothing seemed to be too badly hurt.

"Crap, sorry," he repeated to both Edward and me. "Don't want to break her on her first visit with the vamps. It'll give her a bad impression." Emmett winked at me, and I immediately liked him. I tried to convey that to Edward with my eyes, and he visibly relaxed. But he was still tense, and I remembered Rosalie was still on the steps.

I turned slightly to get a good look at her. She was standing on the first step, her willowy, lean body rigid. Her perfect mouth was frowning, and her topaz eyes were narrowed into slits.

"Rosalie, are you going to say hi to Bella?" Carlisle hedged.

"No," Rosalie replied coldly. "Why would I want to?"

I bit my lip and mouthed "Sorry," at Edward. Though in a houseful of vampires, that gesture was bound to not go undetected. Rosalie glared at me all the more. "Hello, Rosalie," I offered foolishly. Edward's grip tightened on my hand, and I knew I shouldn't have said anything. I didn't dare look at his face, knowing his perfection would be drawn with worry and anger. Instead, I watched as Rosalie made a sound between a huff and a growl, and turned gracefully on her heel. She was out of sight in no time.

The silence that followed seemed very awkward to me, but almost normal to them. "Sorry," Emmett finally offered, the third time he'd apologized since I'd met him. "She's not your biggest fan."

"Understatement," Edward muttered under his breath.

"Edward," Esme said reprovingly.

I just stared in anxiety at their exchange, knowing that all the tension in the house would not be there if I had never interfered in the Cullens' almost-perfect life.

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**love it? hate it? review it, baby! read my other fanfics, vote in my poll, enter my contest! lovelovelove, m**


	5. Twilight: Nonbeliever

_**Twilight**_**: Nonbeliever**

**What if...Bella had told Alice and Jasper when James called her?**

**Here's what Stephenie wrote in **_**Twilight**_**, p 430-431: " I had to think clearly, because Alice and Jasper were waiting for me. ... Then I ... went to face Alice."**

She saw my face and stood up in alarm. "Bella? Bella, what's wrong?" she asked, concerned.

"Alice," was the only word I could get out before I broke down. Alice danced toward me, wary. I fell into her stone shoulder and sobbed for everything I was about to do. I couldn't speak or breathe. I just cried. Alice's hand rubbed my back in comfort. But then I suddenly felt better, wondering why I'd been so overwrought before. I looked up, and I saw Jasper standing there.

"Bella, what is it?" he asked calmly. The serenity kept its hold on me, and it helped me answer him, and Alice, more clearly.

"That wasn't my mother calling," I informed them in a monotone. "It was James. He has my mom, and unless I follow his instructions, he will kill her."

Alice gasped. "Oh, Bella, you can't go. Think of everything. Think of Edward, Charlie, Renée—"

"I am thinking of Renée. That's why I have to go," I pressed. "If I don't go, James will kill her. What other choice do I have?"

Alice and Jasper were silent for a moment. Then Alice spoke. "I'm sure his number is on caller ID. If I called it, or if Jasper did, what would James do?" she mused aloud.

"He will kill Renée!" Why wasn't it getting into their heads that if anyone interfered, Renée would die? The only way to save her was my death. So, of course, I had to die. I knew it would hurt Edward, and Charlie, and everyone I'd gotten to know in my brief stay in Forks. But I had to go. In the threat of my mother's life, mine meant very little.

"Bella, you're under a lot of stress," Jasper said soothingly. "Why don't you go and get some rest? Alice and I have it under control." Though I wasn't so sure, I was suddenly tired. I accepted defeat and retreated back to the room, shutting the door. Whatever Alice and Jasper were doing didn't require my presence, and I gratefully sunk into sleep.

When I woke up again, it was light. The clock said 3:00 pm. I got out of bed and stretched, then padded into the front room where Jasper and Alice were once again staring with blank eyes at the depressing news. "Good afternoon, Bella," Alice said without looking up.

"Hi, Alice. Hey, Jasper," I responded, following their gazes to see if they were watching to receive information, or just to pass the time. After a long while, I said, "Have you done anything about my mother?"

Jasper's gold eyes broke away from the headlines to glance at Alice. She nodded minutely. "We called James on the number he left on caller ID," he began gravely.

"What?" I shrieked. The concern for Renée's safety broke through the remaining grogginess left over from sleep. "How could you?" I demanded, suddenly furious. "Think about Renée! What did he do to her? Tell me what the hell James did to her!"

"Bella, Bella, calm," Jasper instructed, and a peaceful atmosphere settled around me. "Alice was suspicious of James and his phone call. We didn't believe what he said. So Alice called, and it turned out we were right."

"What?" I cried again, completely derailed by this answer.

"It was a ruse. He never had your mother," Alice piped up. "I had my doubts. I focused on Renée, and nothing seemed to be a problem."

"How did you find out?" I pressed.

"I just said, 'Hello, this is Alice Cullen. May I please speak to Renée?' And he admitted everything," Alice told me.

"But why?" I asked, absolutely mystified. "Why did he just give up?"

"I don't know," Alice admitted. "I think he knew enough about us to know that there was no way to keep the truth from us, and he was taking the path of least resistance. But why isn't the point. The point is you're safe, Bella! James won't be nosing around in Phoenix anymore. And Jasper has already talked to Edward. He's flying in to get you today."

Edward was coming. I suddenly felt like no one in the world could stop me now. Edward would come, and I would be safe, at least for now, and everything would be all right. "Edward's coming? What time?" I demanded, sounding overly anxious. Alice laughed aloud.

"Relax, Bella, we're leaving in a few minutes. Pack up your stuff," she told me, and I eagerly dashed into the little bedroom.

Edward was coming.

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**i'm not sure how i feel about this one either. hmm, what do y'all think? review and tell me. be mean if that's what it takes, flames welcomed! go vote in my sexiest Twilight man poll, enter my Silence fanfic contest, read "Want" by willowgrace511, read my other stories, and check out my new community that kicks ass! lovelovelove, m**


	6. Twilight: Brand New

_**Twilight**_**: Brand New**

**What if...Edward had let the venom spread, and Bella had been changed then?**

**Here's what Stephenie wrote in **_**Twilight**_**, p 455: "Carlisle was bent over me, working on my head. 'Edward, you must do it now, or it will be too late.'"**

Edward hesitated. "I...I don't know, Carlisle..." He trailed away.

"It's either she changes or you have to taste her blood," Carlisle reminded him. "If you're going to do it, you cannot wait!"

"Edward!" I screamed. Edward's eyes burned with regret.

"I can't," he whispered. It was almost too low for me to hear. "I can't. Because I know I won't be able to stop. And I'd rather her be one of the eternal damned, be with me forever, then for me to have the burning regret of Bella's death on my shoulders." He stroked my cheek, and the coolness of his fingers contrasted sharply with the burning underneath my skin. "Bella, Bella, love, I'm so sorry," he murmured to me.

I didn't open my mouth to speak. I knew it would unleash another scream, and the regret in his voice was already so tangible. So, though the pain was excruciating, beyond excruciating, I kept silent.

"I love you so much," he reminded me, his cool hands now brushing gently through my tangled, dirty, bloody hair. "And I'm sorry it's too late to save you now." He bent to kiss my forehead. His lips were ice against my skin.

For a long, long time, I burned. I knew that I would be just like him, a vampire, at the end, but I feared that it was just a made-up story, and I would end up razed to a pile of smoldering ashes. The whole time, I was thinking three words: _Let me die_. I was on fire for so long that the pain almost began to seem monotonous. It seemed normal. It was like I couldn't remember life before the pain. But I definitely felt when it ended. It trickled very slowly out of my fingers and toes, through my arms and legs. But although the pain in my limbs was gone, it had all moved straight to my heart. Its beats sounded like the flap of a hummingbird's wings, fast and high-pitched. It was much worse than any of the previous pains, and my fervent death wishes increased.

I had been relatively silent through the whole ordeal. I knew how much it was hurting Edward to watch me change. I was wondering if he regret his decision to let me change, instead of trying to suck the venom out and leave me human, like Carlisle suggested. But when my heart lifted out of my chest, I screamed out loud. I was able to hear Edward's voice, though I couldn't tell if it was a hallucination or if he was actually speaking to me. He was murmuring my name in a tortured voice. I wanted to tell him how sorry I was, but I knew it would all end up in a scream.

Then, there were three dull, dead thumps from my chest. _Ga-lump. Ga-lump. Ga-lump._ And it was over. The changing process was complete. And I was a vampire.

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**a few things...sorry for not updating quicker, sorry these are so short (YOU try making them longer), and yes i changed my pen name. do you like it? also, go check out my profile and stuff, read the stories in my community. also sorry if this is remotely depressing. i don't try. okay, that's everything, i think. oh wait! if you've never heard of_ Esmée Denters you should go check her out. she has an amazing voice. okay, this is weird, idk why it's all italic-y but i can't seem to fix it. oh well. review, no ghostreading! lovelovelove, m  
_**


	7. New Moon: Roadblocks

_**New Moon:**_** Roadblocks**

**What if...Jasper had managed to get to Bella?**

**Here's what Stephenie wrote in **_**New Moon**_**, p 29: "There was ... a grisly snarling that seemed to be coming from deep in Jasper's chest. Jasper tried to shove past Edward, snapping his teeth just inches from Edward's face."**

**This one's different, though. I'm writing the scene from Jasper's point of view! Enjoy!**

We all watched as Bella began to unwrap Edward's gift. She stuck her finger under the tape to try to rip it up, but she didn't manage to. "Shoot," she mumbled when she gave herself a paper cut. I stopped breathing, glaring at the exposed blood, and tried not to let it incapacitate me.

Then, overprotective Edward flung himself at Bella, yelling, "No!" I sighed. He was underestimating me, thinking that one paper cut would make me lose it. They crashed into the cake, and Bella landed in the shattered crystal cake plate. A long, sharp shard of glass carved a line through Bella's forearm, and bright red blood flowed from the open wound. Then, I did lose it.

My conscience flew in the opposite direction from me as I hurled myself at the blood. It was my only focus now. The room, and Alice, had melted away from around me. Edward curved around Bella, and I slammed into his body. He was merely a roadblock, something I had to fight my way blindly through to get to Bella. She smelled so good, and I _needed_ to feed. I snarled under my breath and thrashed against Edward, snapping my teeth at him. I felt hands bind my hands behind my back, but I fought on. There were two roadblocks now, one in front and one behind, and I was determined to get past both.

"Come on, Jasper," I heard distantly from behind me. I couldn't tell who spoke. Rosalie appeared in my line of vision and pushed Edward out of the way, grabbing me around my arms. I struggled against Rosalie's binding grip and whoever was behind me, and eventually, we all three went tumbling to the yard.

I couldn't smell it so strongly now, but it was definitely there. Making sure Rosalie, and whoever else was with us in the yard, wouldn't notice until it was too late, I ran back into the house. The door was shut, but it was just another easily passed roadblock, and I broke through it. I pushed my way against Edward, who was now back in front of me. He was younger, but I was more experienced, and it took little time to pass him. I didn't worry about my thoughts revealing my strategy; my methods were more complex than anything he would be able to defend against. I had to fight Carlisle, too, which was hard; after all Carlisle had done for me, it went against my grain to crush him so easily. But he gave in quickly, due to his hate of violence, and I made my way to Bella.

But then, a flash of black hair appeared in my sight. It was Alice. She had taken up the guard, and was protecting Bella. "Jazz," she whispered. Her melodic voice cracked my wild instincts. "Jazz, don't do this." I was torn. Alice...or the hypnotic, pulsing, tempting blood? I pushed past her, gently but with force. Then, I reached Bella—and her blood.

I leaned down. "Jasper, no!" Alice cried. "Edward, I've got it, relax," she added. "You and Carlisle stay back!" She wrapped her arms around my waist. They were slender, but strong. "Jasper—don't—do—this!" She pushed with all her might against me. And, just like that, I stopped. I gained enough composure to hold my breath, and in doing so, I couldn't smell her anymore. I sat down on the ground, abruptly full of regret.

"Let's go," Alice suggested, gently guiding me out the door frame. I let her drag me away from Bella and the blood, and the mess I'd made.

Rosalie, Emmett, and Esme were in the yard. Emmett was looking away, but Rosalie was glaring at me, and Esme had a soft expression on her face. "I'm sorry," I mumbled, barely audible, before shaking Alice's arms off me, and running toward the woods.

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**awww, poor Jasper. i love it when he needs to be comforted. (haha step aside Alice!) like the new pen name? it's my favorite things (in no particular order. if it was in order then it would be TwilightParamoreEvanescence but i like it this way better.). okay, review, don't ghostread or i'll track you down and grind your bones to make my bread!! lovelovelove, m**


	8. New Moon: Déjà Vu

**_New Moon_: Déjà Vu**

**What if...Bella had gone into the bar in Port Angeles?**

**Here's what Stephenie wrote in **_**New Moon**_**, pp. 108 and 110: "Across the street there was one open business. ... The biggest sign, in brilliant green, was the name of the bar—One-Eyed Pete's. ... 'Bella! You can't go in a bar!' [Jessica] hissed. ... 'Are you crazy? Are you suicidal?'"**

I ignored Jess's protests. Something was drawing me here, and the sense of déjà vu mixed with this new impulse was too much to ignore.

**"'****Bella, stop this right now!' My muscles locked into place, froze me where I stood. Because it wasn't Jessica's voice that rebuked me now. It was a furious voice, a familiar voice, a beautiful voice—like velvet even though it was irate. It was _his_**** voice."**

I kept moving forward. Somehow, his voice did not catapult me into the hole of pain I had been living in for the past four months. It merely intensified the strange desire to go into this bar. For some unknown reason, it was vitally important at this very second for me to go and compare the four drinking men to the year-old memories it nearly pained me to think.

I didn't allow myself to look back, to stare at Jessica, who was most likely goggling at me. I knew she was appalled at what I was doing. But it had been so long since feeling had broken through the numb, icy shell I'd wrapped myself in for a long time now. I crossed the threshold, into the dim, noisy bar that smelled strongly of alcohol. "No!" he screamed at me in my head, infuriated. "Turn around and leave! Go back to Jessica! Now!"

"No," I answered it bravely. This answer attracted the attention of the men I'd been studying.

"Hey," one of the men said. I gave him closer scrutiny, and to my disappointment, he was not one of the four who'd try to hurt me the last time I was in Port Angeles. Upon quick glances, none of the other four were.

"Hi," I muttered.

"Bella, go! Now! These men are dangerous, Bella, can't you see that?"

_Shut up!_

"Can we buy you a drink, babe?" one offered with a drunken grin. "You seem like a screwdriver type. Can we getcha a screwdriver?"

"No, thanks," I replied, wondering what a screwdriver was.

"C'mon, honey, don't be coy with us," the third one slurred. "We won't hurt you."

"They will hurt you! Bella! Get away from there as fast as you can!"

This time, I heeded his advice. I turned on my heel, disappointed, and stalked back to where Jessica was standing. Her face was pale white, aghast. "Bella! God! Why did you go into a _bar_?" She was nearly as angry as Ed—as _he _was.

"Um," I came up with weakly. I decided it was best if I stayed silent, and so I did. I let Jessica fume in silence as we traipsed back to her Mercury.


End file.
